LA CROSSE, WI—In a formidable display of her newly acquired knowledge, local School of the Art Institute of Chicago freshman Laura Sellers excitedly told...
NEW YORK—Alleging “massive systemic theft” of his original work, bestselling fantasy author George R.R. Martin filed a federal lawsuit against OpenAI this week after...
CHICAGO—Mindlessly shoveling the dry meat into his mouth while staring at the television, local dad Ron Guadiano was reportedly snacking on a bowl of...
LOS ANGELES—Screaming in terror at the approaching hordes of hissing, red-eyed former celebrities, attendees at the 93rd Academy Awards fled Sunday as the actors...
BELLINGHAM, WA—Admitting that his physical transformation didn’t even come close to cutting it, local nerd Hayden Gardner told reporters Monday he had spent all...
Researchers have confirmed the existence of a distinct structure inside our planet’s inner core, saying the newly discovered “innermost inner core” is a solid...
TUCSON, AZ—Stating it “just didn’t add up,” the U.S. populace told reporters Wednesday that they didn’t understand how someone as cool as Kyrsten Sinema...
WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA—Updating the company’s terms of service, live-entertainment giant Ticketmaster announced Wednesday that it would soon be requiring customers to purchase round-trip tickets...